Ways to Pray

I am so grateful to know that there are many who read this blog who faithfully pray for our family. YOU are participating in orphan care! This post is for you. I'd like to cautiously share some specific ways you can continue to lift us up in prayer.

Three months into our adventure, I can say with certainty that I don't regret or question that we made the right decision in welcoming this precious girl into our family. Has our life been turned upside down? Yes! Have we experienced some really difficult days? Yes! Have I questioned God as to whether I can endure during those difficult days? Absolutely. Yet God continues to remind me again and again that this IS the path that He is leading us down. There are many blessings too and if you've read this blog for long, you have surely seen how much Irina fits with our family.

As I've shared before, Irina is strong and she is a survivor. However, no child should ever have to endure the rejection, neglect and abandonment that she has endured. When I let myself think about her history too much I get stomach aches and serious heart ache. In the day to day though, I'm struggling with guilt. Knowing bits of what she has experienced, it is hard to feel freedom to create my own space away from her. She has been without nurturing for so long that she craves it desperately. She is so needy for constant interaction and physical contact. As a highly sensitive person, this has been very challenging for me. However, when I try to create the space I need for my mental well-being I am filled with guilt. Please pray that the Spirit will help me to establish the appropriate boundaries that will satisfy Irina's need for contact and enable me to function without feeling guilty or resentful. Please pray that I will love her well (as well as the rest of my family...oh my!) Thank you for praying.

We conducted a trial class for Irina last week, thanks to two very servant hearted friends (Carla and Jessica). Up until this point, Irina has never been apart from either Darin or me. It is time to prepare her to be dropped off at either Sunday School or Community Bible Study with the boys. We wanted to test and see how she would do following instructions from another authority figure in a structured environment away from home. We needed to determine if language would be an issue or if there were any other difficulties. I'm so glad Carla and Jessica were willing to facilitate a class for all 9 kids while I had some time away.

Praise the Lord for these friends and for great success! I think Irina did better because I wasn't there. According to their reports, Irina did not demand constant attention and followed instructions well. When she gets nervous, she typically regresses in her maturity and yet they didn't see any major signs of this. Hallelujah! However, later that evening she quickly realized what the purpose of our trial class was. She spent 20-30 minutes crying and sobbing that evening that she did NOT want to go to Sunday School or Community Bible Study. She did NOT want to be without Mommy. "Stay WITH Mommy!" Every day since then she has asked if she has to go to class without Mommy today. It has created quite a bit of anxiety for her. Please pray that as we attempt to drop her off in the coming weeks that she is not afraid and that she has a great time.

Thank you for praying and following along with our journey.