Real Meaning Rambles

At the start of December, I was very discouraged by Christmas materialism (in me, in my kids, and in the world). As I've been exposed to more poverty and neediness recently, I have been uncomfortable with participating in frivolous spending. I know the poverty and neediness have always been there, but now I know real people who struggle to know where their next bite of food will come from. Friends we made in Ukraine have been forced to escape their homes and cities. They are thinking about housing, blankets, and necessities as opposed to lego sets, dolls, and other wants.

I've been surprised by how quickly Irina has become the stereotypical American. "You need to get me (fill in the blank) for Christmas! You better get me (fill in the blank)!" she demands. The threat of a tantrum is right at the surface. Surely she remembers when she had so little? Surely she recognizes how much more she has then a little over a year ago? Christmas brings with it all sorts of emotions for her. She may not even understand what she is feeling. Unfortunately, those emotions cause BIG reactions. I read THIS blog post from Jen Hatmaker and was encouraged to know this is a somewhat common reaction for kids from hard places.

Honestly, the boys are probably not any less materialistic then her. They are just a little more covert with their greedy desires. Perhaps that is true of me too? However, I must point out that while Irina is overt with her wants and demands, she is also always the first to effusively thank us for anything given to her. What a roller coaster ride!?

Then I stop and ask myself, "Why are we giving gifts at all? It's not our birthday. What gifts are we getting for Jesus?" Goodness! When you combine observed materialism, poverty, big emotions, and a desire to keep things simply focused on Jesus you get a mom who is a jumbled mess.  

I'm stuck in this tension and Darin has been patient with me as I have wrestled through the jumbled mess. When the kids slip up, I think to myself, "Ha! They don't deserve any gifts." God keeps reminding me that He doesn't withhold any gifts from me because of my behavior. I'm given the greatest gift in Jesus whether I'm naughty or nice. Oh how he loves us. I'm thankful God is reminding me of His love this advent.

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith - and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - not by works, so that no one can boast." Ephesians 2:8-9

"How great is the love that the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!" 1 John 3:1

Back in November, I signed up to participate in Lifesong's Advent for Orphans. You can read more about it HERE. I had no idea how much we would all enjoy it and how much it would challenge all of us concerning our materialism (myself included). It has become our morning activity during breakfast. 

We read scripture, pray, and collect money as the little window prompts. Each day it suggests a particular amount to collect. At the end of advent we will turn in our money and 100% of the proceeds will go to orphans. (For example, give 20 cents for every coat you have in your house. Or give 3 cents for every ornament you have on your tree. Or, give $2.75 for every person in your house that has a 4th grade education.) 

We have told the kids they can give as they feel led and they watch me put money in our jar every day. Their giving needs to come from their heart and it's been encouraging to see moments of their generosity. My tender hearted middle boy emptied his entire wallet in the jar. He didn't do it with any fanfare or prompting. I'm thankful that God nudged me to sign up for this and for the ways it has been an appropriate answer to my struggle with our materialism. Maybe this is our gift for Jesus this year?

In the evening during supper, we've also been reading the book above. If you are looking for a family advent devotional it's a great one. Maybe one of these days I can get through a reading without a voice tinged with emotion? God's "unconditional, unstoppable, unwrappable" love is knocking me off my feet.

I started writing this blog post in early December. I never felt good about publishing it. Twenty or so days later after lots of editing I am ready to post it. I can see how God has been at work in our family and in my heart. Jesus is coming! He's coming to my family and He is coming to yours. Do you see Him at work? Will you choose to "unwrap the greatest Gift" this Christmas?